Unmarried and Proud
Angel Adams and Desmond Hatchett have never met, but they have a lot in common. They are both poor. They both have more children than seven typical families put together. They are both unmarried. And they both expect the government to pay for their lifestyle choices.
Angel Adams made headlines last year for her proclamation that it is the government’s job to pay to raise her children. Angel has 15 children with three different men. Twelve of the children are under the age of 15.
There are some people helping out, but they need to do more, she says. “Somebody needs to pay for all my children. … Somebody needs to be held accountable, and they need to pay,” she said, as she waved her arm toward her 12 kids now living with her.
Somebody needs to be held accountable? You mean besides her?
Did someone force her to have so many children? “They were gifts of God,” she says—like somehow it was God’s fault. “Whatever God wants to happen is okay with me.”
Do you really think God wanted her to start a family without a husband? Do you think God wanted her to have 10 children with a “fiancé” who was a cocaine dealer? Does God really want neglected, impoverished children without fathers? Does He want boys without a father role model? Does He want girls learning from a mother who is having to act like a father?
“I’ve been railroaded since day one,” she said, even though the state pays for a six-bedroom house, utilities and food, and has provided furnishings for her family.
“A lot of people have gone way extra miles for you,” countered Circuit Judge Tracy Sheehan. “Do you understand that?”
Adams’s reply: “No comment, your honor.”
Nick Cox, a regional director for the Department of Children and Families, spoke on behalf of several agencies that are trying to help Angel—even paying off $6,000 worth of her debt.
“Everyone has bent over backward,” he said. “The mother has been less than gracious.”
It was a vast understatement.
What makes the situation even more sad is that her attitude—the entitlement mentality, her ingratitude, the total absence of personal accountability—is being passed on to her children. Her beautiful, unhappy children.
This idea that you can do whatever you want, make any choices in life you wish, have the government come in and provide your every need, and not have to live with the consequences is hurting the whole country.
Desmond Hatchet is more proof. Desmond is a 33-year-old “father” of 30 children. But he is only a father in the biological sense. It is tough to spend much time with your children when they are spread across 11 different mothers.
Last week he was in court asking for a break on child support. When his minimum wage salary gets divvied up, there isn’t much left to live on. Sadly, on some months, his children only get a dollar or two.
Desmond explains: He had four kids in the same year. Two different times. By accident.
In 2009, when he first went before a judge for failure to pay child support, he had 21 children. He said he was done. He had learned his lesson. He then had nine more children—by accident.
What were these women thinking? This makes this case even more notable. In a society full of out-of-wedlock childbirths, Desmond’s children were not accidents. Many of Desmond’s sperm depositories knowingly and willingly had children—and even second children—with him. They knew that he had 21, 23, 28 children already. They knew he wouldn’t be around.
And they didn’t care.
Yes, many women today don’t care whether or not they have a husband. Desmond is young and attractive, and he makes them feel special. So they have his children. And his seconds. And someday probably his thirds.
And who pays for all these children? Not 33-year-old Desmond with his minimum-wage job. Not the single mothers with their babies.
You pay. Food stamps. Subsidized housing. Taxes for deadbeats, delinquents and selfish, mooching mothers.
In 2011, there were almost 20 million children living with delinquent or absent fathers, according to data referenced by cnn.
No typo—20 million. I read that and then realized that, sadly, America doesn’t care. If it did, there would be outrage. There would be shame. There would be change.
Then I realized that America’s president came from a broken family. Hollywood is one big broken family. Sperm banks and scientists let single women become mothers. Doctors who are supposed to help people, help create future lives of misery.
Single family parenting has gone mainstream. It is even glamorous. Think of all the single-with-children celebrities.
“Single mothers, stand proud,” headlined cnn on Mother’s Day. The gist of the article was this: Yes a multitude of studies show that single moms largely produce “screwed-up kids.” And yes, kids from single parents are much likelier to drop out of high school, end up in crummier jobs, make less money, suffer emotional problems, abuse drugs, commit crime, and have out-of-wedlock children themselves, thus perpetuating the cycle. But that is the bad news, and people should focus on the other sides of those figures: the kids who succeed and the single moms who get them there.
How can anybody justify writing this kind of garbage? Only the fact that so many people desperately want to believe it.
The Huffington Post says that with graduation approaching, it is time to honor all the single mothers going to university who “juggle family, jobs and school so that their children can have the best future possible.” Thousands of single mothers are succeeding due to government programs that put them and their children through school at the same time, says the author. But it is a lie. The best thing for those children would be if they had a fully functioning family complete with a father, and a mother who spent time with them through most of the day.
America is facing a massive social problem. Its family structure—from which the strength of a nation is built—is crumbling.
Yet so many people deceive themselves into believing that this is something to be proud of. With America’s economy in collapse, and America’s welfare state facing extinction, it isn’t something people will be proud of for long.